


pâquerette

by the-bi-sokka-club (blametheone)



Series: Zukka Song Fics [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: ATLA Modern AU, Aang being a really good buddy, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Comfort/Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Modern AU, Post-Break Up, Song fic, background kataang, iiiiits a break up fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:21:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26908807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blametheone/pseuds/the-bi-sokka-club
Summary: Sokka and Zuko were dating, and then they weren't.
Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: Zukka Song Fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1963387
Comments: 12
Kudos: 102





	pâquerette

**Author's Note:**

> this song fic is actually based on four songs all at once because they all gave me the same idea. 
> 
> Pâquerette (Without Me) by With Confidence  
> Bruise by With Confidence  
> I Was A Cage by Right Away! Great Captain  
> Clairvoyant by The Story So Far

Zuko and Sokka tell everyone they started dating at the end of high school.

Their friends disagree.

Katara is able to say with complete confidence that Sokka has been head-over-heels for Zuko since the beginning of senior year, and Aang is able to confirm that Zuko had been in love with Sokka since at least the beginning of junior year, if not before.

Suki has speculated that Sokka was in love with Zuko nearly as soon as they met, but didn’t realise it. Mai would agree that Zuko was the same.

Toph would tell you that ‘officially dating’ means nothing, because those two were all over each other for at least six months before they had the guts to have an actual conversation about being in a relationship.

But regardless, they graduated high school, and when the gang went out to celebrate the accomplishment, Sokka pulled Zuko away for a private moment out the front of the diner and the gang’s ordeal of trying to get them to admit their feelings to each other was finally over.

The first stage of their relationship was defined by the summer, where they were gross at all times and caught up in the newness of finally being together. The rest of the gang referred to them as ‘unbearable’ but secretly they thought it was sweet.

They were good for each other, and supported each other. When Zuko decided to not go to university straight away, Sokka eagerly encouraged him to do whatever he wanted, and that included chilling out for a while before making a major life decision. When Sokka applied for a Bachelor of Engineering to three of the local universities, Zuko sat up with him the whole night before scores were released and cheered just as loud as Sokka when three acceptance emails came through on his laptop.

Their summer was spent learning how to be in a relationship together, and taking the time to enjoy one another. Sokka got to know Iroh properly, and was persuaded (bullied) into helping out at the tea shop when he came over in the busy periods. Zuko made good friends with Hakoda after bumping into him once or twice in the dark when both of them were kept awake by insomnia (they played cards together most nights, now, and Zuko would brew them hot tea to share).

The autumn of their relationship was continuing to love each other through the harder stuff, and learning to trust one another.

Sokka began his first semester at university, which quickly consumed the majority of his time. He spent a lot of nights staying back at the labs and in the library, trying to finish off projects and wrap his head around some of the trickier theories that didn’t make any sense to him until he had consumed four Red Bulls and met God.

Zuko found himself without Sokka, and had to relearn to individuate, and cherish the time that they did have together. He and Aang spent a lot of time adventuring and travelling to local places, and Aang sequestered Zuko on his expedition to sign up at the local Buddhist temple for weekly mediations. Zuko and Aang fortified a bond together through meditation and martial arts and it kept Zuko out of his own head, which was a blessing.

The winter was the warm and comfortable period of their relationship, slowly beginning to settle into a more serious relationship. Sokka had a mid-semester break at the end of winter, and they spent it by renting a cabin for a week and spending nearly the entire time under blankets or throwing snow at each other. Zuko whispered, ‘I love you,’ on Sokka’s skin and for a brief moment Sokka had a vision of a future where they were still together, with a house and careers and fancy cars. It was a fantasy to come back to later, when they were more serious, had been together longer, but it comforted him in that moment to think that their love was enough to last forever.

At the beginning of spring Zuko and Aang were in a car accident late at night.

The car took most of the damage, Zuko had insurance and they weren’t at fault. Aang escaped with only a bruise on his elbow and some scratches on his forearms from the glass, but Zuko’s ribs were broken from the impact of the seatbelt.

Other than his ribs, he was perfectly fine, and insisted as such whenever anyone tried to fret over him. Sokka had to have a doctor say it to believe it, but Zuko really was okay.

But, as the weeks went on and Zuko was stuck inside, unable to work in the shop and unable to spar with Aang, Sokka watched the decline in Zuko’s mental health.

It started with the snappy comments. Never directed at Sokka, but everyone else was a potential target, at all times, especially if they were trying to help him. He never snapped at Sokka, but he would get huffy and grumpy if Sokka did try to help him.

After that was the silences, the reclusive behaviours. Zuko stopped talking to them unless directly spoken to, and even then would take hours or days to reply to any texts. He became difficult to uphold a conversation with, and slowly stopped attending group events.

Then came the moods, the awful, dark, glowering moods that lasted days. Sokka could put a hand on Zuko’s shoulder and it would be shrugged off. He didn’t want to do anything, ever, didn’t want to eat or drink or sleep.

Zuko got angry, snarky, defensive – he pushed himself too far, trying to stretch and spar like he did before, and was back in the hospital for re-fracturing two of his ribs, extending his bedrest and souring his already bitter mood.

He and Sokka fought for the first time, Sokka finally snapping and calling him out on the behaviour and Zuko not taking too fondly to being called out.

He didn’t speak to Sokka for a week, and didn’t come out of his room that whole time either.

At the end of spring, Zuko broke up with him.

(“I can’t keep putting you through this,” Zuko whispered into the phone and tried to pretend he couldn’t hear Sokka sniffling on the other end. “I don’t want to hurt you anymore, and I don’t know how to stop myself. I know I’m not doing well, and you shouldn’t have to put up with it.”)

Sokka spent a week in Katara’s bed.

He didn’t speak to anyone but her and their father for three weeks. He cried for at least the first few days, but after that he didn’t make a sound at all.

Aang eventually was allowed into the room and cuddled up next to Sokka wordlessly for a few hours while Katara made dinner with Hakoda, and Aang was the one that managed to convince Sokka to get up and have dinner with them.

Zuko, alternately, threw himself full-body into every activity he possibly could to try and consume his thoughts and stop himself from thinking about Sokka.

He resumed sparring and meditating with Aang (but the meditating part was awful and after he broke down in sobs twice Aang decided maybe they wouldn’t sit for hours on end with their thoughts anymore). He worked as many shifts at the tea shop as he could, his customer-service persona able to take over his body and stop him from thinking about Sokka every two minutes. Toph took him on a hike through the countryside and he relished in the full-body feeling of aching thighs and burning lungs and being able to sit atop a mountain with Toph’s dog panting in his lap.

But he still cried when he got back home.

Aang pulled Zuko into his lap one night, after the older had mumbled that he wanted to call Sokka all the time and tell him he’s sorry, and Aang said,

“How about whenever you want to text him, you text me?”

And Zuko had nodded and remained quiet.

It was two months after the breakup that Sokka called. And called. And sent a text that read, ‘stop ignoring me zuko we need to talk about katara’s bday party’.

(“Look, it’s,” Sokka rubbed at his nose absently, phone to his ear. “It’s whatever.”

The kitchen was quiet, as should be expected. He could hear his sister and dad talking absently during the adverts while they watched television in the other room, dinner cleared away and forgotten.

“It doesn’t matter what happened, I don’t want to lose any of my friends, but I really don’t want you to lose them either,” Sokka breathed into the phone. And he meant it. He would honestly prefer to lose his friends if he knew they were taking care of Zuko.

“So, you think we can be… friends?” Zuko’s voice was quiet, nearly breaking, muffled by the phone receiver.

“Yeah.” _Lie_. “I think we’re both mature enough to do that.”

When the call ended, Sokka put his phone down gently on the tiles to stop himself from throwing it across the room.)

Summer eventually ended, and autumn began.

True to their word, Sokka and Zuko told their friends to not worry about choosing between them, that they had mutually decided to keep their distance but still be amicable. Their friends, however, knew fully well that they were full of shit, and did their best to keep them as separated as possible.

After the enduring and whole-body uncomfortable awkwardness that was Katara’s birthday party, there were no more full-group celebrations. They made sure to not create a split between Team Sokka and Team Zuko, and everyone all mixed together and hung out in small groups that changed as rapidly as possible – but it was a conjoined effort to avoid having them in a room together.

Aang, not enjoying the conflict, opted to celebrate his birthday by having one-on-one days with each of his friends.

Katara would take her brother out for coffee and food whenever Aang, Toph and Zuko were hanging out. Katara and Zuko would catch up most weekends, Toph would come and annoy Sokka at his school, Suki and Katara would have girls’ days and would drag one or the other along if Toph or Aang wanted to do something.

When they were in a room together, they were peaceful, but stayed as far away from each other as possible.

(“I’m sorry,” Sokka mumbled, bumping Katara’s shoulder with his own. “For ruining the group.”

Katara nearly spat her iced tea down the front of her shirt, stopping still and fervently shaking her head.

“What are you talking about?” she pulled him aside, leaving the sidewalk clear because it was obvious that they needed to have a Conversation. “You didn’t-”

“I did,” Sokka cut her off. “Or, we did. And I’m sorry it’s taking so long to-”

Katara rolled her eyes and Sokka stopped.

“Are you rolling your eyes while I’m trying to be vulnerable and emotional?” he raised an eyebrow, joking softly. Katara smiled and huffed through her nose.

“It’s going to take time,” she insisted. “Stop trying to be sorry for how much time you take.”

Sokka was quiet, his gaze distant, and Katara just stood with him, patient and capable. Sokka wasn’t the kind of person to blurt out the first thing on his mind. She had known Sokka her whole life and had spent that entire life being patient during the tough times.

Sokka would sit, sometimes for entire minutes, putting his sentences together in the best possibly way, so that he point would come across exactly how he wanted it to. Sometimes the time was taken to build up the courage to say what he needed to, and other times it was planning out and predicting the conversation that would erupt from whatever he said.

Katara had learnt to sit and wait by him, instead of push him to talk or talk in between. Had learnt to preoccupy herself in the minutes that passed. Because when he did speak, it was usually worth hearing.

“I really loved him,” Sokka eventually spoke, rubbing his arm distantly. “And I think I still do. We were talking about moving in together before everything happened and-”

Katara blinked and her lips fell open – very unaware of that fact – but didn’t interrupt yet.

“-and I keep thinking that if I call him, we’d just… go from where we left off. And I don’t want to move on, because… what if we could? What if we could just start again?”

Katara frowned and her eyes drifted downwards as she contemplated all of this.

Aang had made Katara promise that she would never, ever tell Sokka the things that Zuko told Aang. Of course Aang had told Katara, because, well, they told each other everything. Aang and Katara had been together since they were fourteen and twelve, and like most couples in a long-term relationship, had developed the closest thing to a human-equivalent of a hive mind in the time that they had been together. So Katara knew that Zuko, like Sokka, was also waiting for the magic reset button, for the moment they could start from where they left off.

She pursed her lips, sighed heavily through her nose, and forced a smile.

“I guess we’ll see what happens,” she tilted her head, linking an arm through Sokka’s and pulling him along while she made a mental note to chat with Aang later.)

And that six months of distance had brought them to here – where Toph had finally been accepted into a physical health science course, after a year of battling with the school for her place in the course and for them to make the class actually accessible instead of meeting bare minimum for accreditation. The gang, obviously, needed to celebrate, and the two of them had been invited into the same room again.

Zuko was already there when Sokka and Katara arrived with pizza, Sokka throwing the door open with a shout and pulling Toph into his arms.

“Our baby girl is going to college!” Sokka yelled, swinging Toph around and earning a punch for it.

The night was pretty quiet, considering, and was mostly just their close friends with food, some movies (with descriptive audio, of course, despite Sokka’s jokes that he could describe the movie much better), and a series of toasts for all of them having graduated high school, now. Aang had brought Appa, his Old English Sheepdog, and Toph had brought Beef, her Golden Retriever, and the two of them played with each other for most of the night until they decided to nap together, and then beg for food together.

Zuko saw Sokka pull Suki into his lap and had to stop himself from walking out. Sokka and Suki were platonic before, they were platonic now, and even if they weren’t: Zuko didn’t get to dictate whether Sokka stayed single or not. He lost the right to have any care about Sokka’s dating life.

The night finally started to dwindle, and Zuko took the chance to leave. He ruffled Toph’s hair and hugged her tight for another congratulations, said his goodbyes and shuffled out as soon as he could.

Zuko ran a hand through his hair the second he was on the other side of the door, nearly panting, heart beating so fast it was uncomfortable.

The party was held at Sokka and Katara’s house, and he waved to Hakoda in the kitchen window as he left, trying not to miss their card games and trying to pretend he didn’t know exactly how many steps it was to the front gate.

He sat in his car for a few minutes, collecting his thoughts. He would try to convince himself he was warming the engine, but it was barely past the heat of summer.

Seeing Sokka again had brought up things he didn’t realise he was harbouring, and sitting in his car was a nightmare. Images of Sokka laughing in the front seat flickered through his thoughts, memories of Sokka making fun of his music, putting his hand on Zuko’s leg while he drove, pretending to move the gearstick while they were on the highway.

The crash. The crash that barely impeded him, but he let it consume him, to the point that he hurt Sokka and pushed him away.

Zuko pulled away from the curb and pulled into his driveway without registering any of the time in between. And when he did finally arrive in his driveway, the light of the living room still on and Iroh’s shadow shuffling around inside, he couldn’t get out of the car.

Zuko pulled his phone out of his pocket, leaning against the steering wheel, and in a moment of vulnerability, hit send.

~*~

Aang felt his pocket vibrate, and pulled his phone out while Sokka and Toph teased Katara on the other couch.

 **Zuko** : you know how you said i should text you if i wanted to call sokka?

Aang’s face dropped, and he hummed with a bit of sympathy. Taking a glance around the room he figured the night was pretty much over. Suki had left only shortly after Zuko, and Katara was planning on leaving to her room any minute now (which is what Sokka and Toph had been teasing her about). 

“Hey, guys, I’m gonna head out, too,” Aang grinned, picking up his jacket. “Is it okay if I leave Appa here? I’ve gotta run.”

Katara was frowning at him, and now Sokka and Toph were looking at him funny too.

“Is everything okay?” Katara’s eyes were widened, voice soft. Aang smiled gently and waved his hand.

“It’s fine,” he assured, “I’ll be back in the morning!”

 **Aang** : I’m coming over 2 seconds

~*~

“You didn’t have to come over,” Zuko was practically pouting as he opened the door for Aang, but Aang simply didn’t care. He just barrelled into Zuko’s chest and held on tightly.

“Of course I had to come over!” Aang smiled, kicking the apartment door shut behind him. “Party was done, anyway.”

Aang pulled away and watched Zuko’s façade drop, unintentionally. He could see the effort Zuko was exerting to try and keep his face even, but his eyes were watering and his nose was scrunching and when Aang made a soft noise the dam broke.

“Oh,” Aang’s mouth dropped open, and he shuffled Zuko down the hall and towards his room.

The weird thing was, Aang and Zuko hadn’t actually really talked about the breakup. There were small things here or there because Zuko wasn’t really good at keeping things to himself, but for the most part they had avoided talking about it. Maybe Zuko had avoided it because he knew that Aang was close with the both of them, and would never choose Sokka or Zuko over the other. Maybe Aang had been avoiding it because he didn’t want to be caught in the middle.

Maybe their relationship hadn’t been built on being vulnerable or honest with each other, like the relationship Zuko had built with Katara.

Either way, Aang had a feeling that that was going to change – and he was ready for it to change. He knew enough from both sides that this situation wasn’t sustainable. That Zuko and Sokka would probably not be comfortable in the same room for a long time, and that something had to change somewhere.

“I fucked up…” Zuko murmured, head bent over. Aang rubbed his back and sighed.

“You kind of did,” he agreed, and backed off when Zuko’s head shot up, betrayed.

“You did!” Aang defended. “And I completely understand why, I think it was the best thing at the time and I think you did what was right for the situation, and I love you and I support you and I want you to feel better…”

Aang pulled Zuko in against his chest while he spoke, patting his head.

“But, I think that it was still a bad thing that happened…” he said honestly. He pushed open Zuko’s door and dropped the older onto the bed, crashing down next to him and laying his head down against the blanket, feet still planted on the floor.

“I was caging him,” Zuko muttered. “Keeping him trapped. And tonight… it feels like he’s still trapped.”

Aang rolled his eyes and pushed at Zuko with his foot.

“Ow!” Zuko frowned down at him, “What?”

“You’re wallowing,” Aang sat up and looked at him. “He wasn’t ‘trapped’, he’s _Sokka_. If he wanted to leave, he would have.”

“So, why didn’t he?”

“Because he wanted to _stay_ , Zuko,” Aang huffed. “Sokka loves you.”

Zuko’s head shot up and his eyebrow drew inwards, peering at Aang.

Aang, who just realised he had used present tense, froze up for a moment before deciding to leave it and hope that Zuko hadn’t noticed.

He had.

“Why do you say that?” Zuko raised an eyebrow.

~*~

“Do you think Aang’s okay?” Katara mumbled softly, Toph asleep on her lap. Sokka looked up at her briefly and the corner of his lips barely smiled as he continued scratching Beef’s head.

“Chill, Katara, he’s at Zuko’s.”

Katara looked at him a little incredulously, and Sokka turned his phone to show her.

“He’s got his little Snapchat thing on all the time,” he explained, and watched with a little bittersweet fondness as Katara’s worry melted away.

Sokka pulled his phone back and a wave of something he couldn’t name washed over him.

“I’m gonna go to bed,” he announced, pulling his body off the couch.

Katara kept her mouth shut and gently ran her fingers through Toph’s hair, listening to Sokka baby-talk to Beef while he left the room.

“Why are you following me, huh? You know you can’t get in my bed, you smell real bad and I’m technically allergic to you, bud.”

She sighed and contemplated texting Aang, maybe Zuko, maybe Sokka. But it was better to just let it be, and let them figure things out, no matter what she thought about it.

Toph snorted in her sleep and distracted Katara from her thoughts.

Probably best to try and heave her into a bed.

~*~

“Did Sokka say something?” Zuko asked, and Aang saw his eyes start to mist again and used it as an opportunity to ignore Zuko’s question.

He pulled Zuko in for a hug instead, not saying anything, patting his back softly.

Because the thing was – it was killing Aang not to say anything. When Katara had told him a month ago about Sokka wanting to ‘start again’ with Zuko, she practically had to chain him to a door to stop him from meddling, and that was when she made some very, very good points.

And if Aang said “Sokka’s still in love with you, go to him!” then Zuko would have a self-detrimental cry about how he had ruined things in the first place and would consume himself with guilt about it, and Aang never knew what to say to stop that. Sokka was the only one in their group that could actually get Zuko to chill out when he got angry or upset – it was like a superpower.

And if Katara said “Zuko’s still in love with you, go to him!” then Sokka would overthink every move that everyone in the group had made and come to the conclusion that they were just trying to make him happy, and that they were lying, and that they just wanted to hang out as a group again. Zuko, to date, was the only person that Sokka always fully and whole-heartedly believed, mostly because he was such a bad liar. But also trust.

And if Aang said anything, that would be a particularly quick way to break Sokka’s trust with both Aang and Katara, and Aang couldn’t do that to either of them.

So Aang kept his mouth shut.

“I ruined it,” he said. “He used to love me, unconditionally. And then I ruined it, and he hates me.”

“He doesn’t-”

“He _should_ ,” Zuko cut him off. “He’s such a good person, and he doesn’t hate _anyone_ , and I don’t want to be responsible for ruining that… but I think I did anyway.”

Aang frowned, taking in Zuko’s words, and spotted his phone on the bed behind Zuko.

Fuck it.

With some delicate moving, he carefully brought the phone into his hands, behind Zuko’s back, and silently brought up his messages.

~*~

Katara giggled to herself as she heard heavy, thundering paws on the floors shortly followed by more of Sokka’s baby-talking.

“Oh, now you’re here too, huh? Isn’t it way past doggy bedtime?” he cooed to Beef and Appa. “You both have beds here, why don’t you go sleep in them? Oh- oh _no_ , you guys, you looked so cute, you made me pet you and now I have to wash my hands before my skin sets itself on fire. Hey, crazy idea, do you guys wanna go to your beds?”

Sokka heard his phone buzz and casually glanced at the message from Aang, body halting with a soft frown on his face when he read what Aang had written to him.

 **Aang** : do you hate zuko? like would you call him a bad person?

~*~

Aang pulled away from Zuko and poked his cheek.

“Well,” he hummed, hands on his hips, slipping his phone into his pocket. “I think we’re in for a long night, so I’m going to find some popcorn and we’re going to watch a stupid thriller movie and you’re allowed to make fun of it the whole time.”

Zuko rolled his eyes but nodded. Aang chuckled quietly to himself, and was barely two steps out of the room when his phone started buzzing – four texts coming in, each immediately after the one before it.

 **Sokka** : no never  
**Sokka** : just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean i hate him  
**Sokka** : zuko’s great  
**Sokka** : why?

Aang hummed and texted him again on his way to the kitchen.

 **Aang** : hypothetically  
**Aang** : would you ever get back with him?

The little grey bubble with an ellipsis kept popping up and going down, so Aang locked his phone and focused on making his way through the kitchen instead, letting Sokka take his time.

And when Aang and Zuko had settled in, blankets and popcorn and Zuko scrolling through an imdb list of ‘worst thriller movies ever’, was when Aang’s phone finally buzzed a single time.

**Sokka** : yes


End file.
